A relationship gone sour.
It definitely wasn’t love at first sight.
It definitely wasn’t love at first sight when we met many years ago. I dismissed our first few encounters as ‘not my type.’
But things quickly changed.
The more we saw of each other, the more I felt the sparks flying - and gradually, I decided to commit. We had some great years together. My travels found a new dimension as we embarked on soulful adventures from Guatemala to Georgia.
But the cracks slowly began to show, and with the pandemic, our relationship erupted too. I began to project feelings of anger and anxiety. In turn, I experienced feelings of inadequacy and envy projected back on me. Like two mirrors in the sun, we were burning each other.
I was almost ready to severe this souring relationship with Instagram (what did you think? ;-)). But then something happened.
Amidst the seemingly infinite layers of the Dhauladhar ranges, as the sunset bathed the sky in shades of orange, I got chatting with an elderly Buddhist monk. We spoke about his time in New York giving sermons, the commercialization of spirituality, and the way we humans get tempted to chase money. When he mentioned that he had recently started teaching meditation via Zoom, I couldn’t help but ask, what is the secret to not getting distracted by his phone, especially Instagram?
Instagram and money, he said, these are like any other relationships in your life. You receive something and you give back something. But when they start to consume you, you have to re-examine them.
Those words hit me like the previous night’s hail.
In that moment, I realized that this platform is just a tool like many others in my palm. I may detest its algorithm and the kind of content being pushed to our feeds in the name of travel, but I can’t deny that it has led me to some of the most incredible travel and life opportunities. It’s led me to people and places I may never have known otherwise.
That evening, I decided that I was going to show up differently on Instagram. I curated a favorites feed and set a 30 minute daily timer for the platform. I started a series on how climate change intersects with tourism, gender and local communities. I decided to actively post stories again, to support conscious local businesses I try and love. I’ll continue to receive something and give something back, but I won’t let it consume me again.
May & June recommendations
Conscious travel recommendations, eco-friendly finds and meaningful opportunities, as well as articles, books and films that’ve inspired me.
Travel:
In pursuit of the dream of slower travel, with 6ish months in one place, we moved to Himachal over a month ago. As much as I love the sea, it’s been a reminder that the mountains are where my soul belongs. There is always inspiration and new horizons to be found in the Himalayas:
Inspiring Women I Met in Bhutan – and What “Happiness” Means to Them
Awe-Inspiring Uttarakhand Homestays: Tune Out of Life and Tune Into the Mountains
Read:
I’m usually not drawn to motivational books, but I got quite hooked to Creative Confidence, written by the founders of the design thinking company, IDEO. It was refreshing to look at the world from a design thinking lens, but I only made it halfway through the book before it started to feel too repetitive.
On a friend’s recommendation, I’m now reading Reflections on a Mountain Lake - a collection of talks by Ani Tenzin Palmo, an Englishwoman who grew up in London, moved to India at the age of 20, and spent 12 years meditating in a cave, of which 3 years were in complete isolation! She founded a nunnery in Kangra, and I hope to have the chance to meet her while I’m in the region.
Try:
I had been making bio-enzymes - cleaning liquids made by fermenting orange and lemon peels - back in Goa. But since moving to Himachal, we’re consuming a lot less citrus fruits, so I ordered Coco Custo’s laundry and multi-purpose detergents, made with natural ingredients and delivered in tin boxes. So much better than the harsh, chemical-laden, plastic-packaged Ariel-Surf-Harpic-what have yous!
Check out:
My impact consultancy Climate Conscious Travel partnered with the Netherlands-based boutique digital agency iambassador, to launch Sustainable Cities - a platform that brings you insider suggestions from locals (and past travellers) on how to make more meaningful travel choices in cities around the world! I’d love to hear your feedback, and your wishlist for the cities you’d like to see there.
My stories elsewhere
Stories I’ve written recently, as well as social media posts I’d love for you to check out.
Freelance:
Blog:
Instagram:
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PS: I’ll now be sending The Shooting Star Insider once every 2 months, because time just seems to be flying so fast!
Great piece. Thank you Shiva